How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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