How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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