How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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