How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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