How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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