How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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