How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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