How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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