How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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