How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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