How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.

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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated

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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...

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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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