How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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