How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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