How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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