How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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