How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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