How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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