How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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