How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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