How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.

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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut

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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.


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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.

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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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