How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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