How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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