How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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