How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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