How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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