How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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