How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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