How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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