How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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