How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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