How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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