How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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