How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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