How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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