How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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