How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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