How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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