How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.

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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!

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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.

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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.

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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.

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