How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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