How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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