How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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