How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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