How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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