How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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