How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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