How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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