How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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