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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But the guitarist has to show him first.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?
It needed to be trimmed.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?
Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.
I’m just doing it for kicks.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"
and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?
There are footprints in the butter.
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Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?
Neither, they all burn shorter.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?
Because he is so cool!
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