How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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