How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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