How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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