How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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