How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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