How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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