How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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