How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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