How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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