How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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