How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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