How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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