How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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