How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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