How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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