How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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