How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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