How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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