How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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