How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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