How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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