How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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