How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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