How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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