How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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