How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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