How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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