How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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