How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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How many BBS jokers does it take to tell yet another LBJ?

1,622. One to tell the original joke, and the rest to submit give some minor variation of it! For example:
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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