How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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