How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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