How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.

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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.

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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.

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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.

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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!

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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.

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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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