How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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