How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)

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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine

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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.

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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .

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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle

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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".

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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop

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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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