How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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