How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)

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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.

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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?

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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.

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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?

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