How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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