How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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