How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.

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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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A seal walks into a club...



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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.

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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop

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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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