How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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