How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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