How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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