How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.

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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut

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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.

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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday

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