How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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