How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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