How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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