How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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