How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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