How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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