How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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