How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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