How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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