How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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