How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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