How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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