How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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