How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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