How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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