How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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