How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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