How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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