How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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