How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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