How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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