How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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