How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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