How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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