How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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