How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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