How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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