How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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