How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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