How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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