How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.

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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.

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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs

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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.

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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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