How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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