How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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