How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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