How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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