How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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