How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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