How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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