How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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