How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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