How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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