How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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