How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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