How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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