How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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