How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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