How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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