How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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