How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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