How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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