How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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