How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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