How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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