How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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