How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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