How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?

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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.

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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah

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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.

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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis

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