How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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