How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?

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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.

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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.

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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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