How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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