How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.

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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies

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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish

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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!

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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!

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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.

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