How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.

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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.

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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah

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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon

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