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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?
One.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?
Discrimination.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?
The scales.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.
Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.
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What has a head but no body?
A nail.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?
Feyonce
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?
Bone appetit!
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How do crows stick together in a flock?
Velcrow.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?
Because they taste funny!
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