How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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