How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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