How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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