How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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