How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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