How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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