How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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