How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.


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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine

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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.

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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.

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