How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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