How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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