Super Pickle!
or
if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."
or
When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Three:
One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and
one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
or
The disk-o!
or