How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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