How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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