How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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