How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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