How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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