How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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