How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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