How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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