How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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