How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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