How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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