How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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