How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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