How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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