How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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