How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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