How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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