How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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