How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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