How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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