How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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