How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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