How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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