How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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