How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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