How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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