How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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