How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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