How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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