How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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