How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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