How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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