How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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