Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
or
God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
or
They both have a hole in one!
or
Decalfinated
or
Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
or
A can of people.
or
None, because they were copycats
or
To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
or
Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
or
Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
or