How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!

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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.

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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends

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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.


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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.

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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.

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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...

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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.

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