How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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