How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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