How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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