How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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