How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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