How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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