How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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