How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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