How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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