How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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