How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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