How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.

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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.

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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!

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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.

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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!

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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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