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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?
It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What fish only swims at night?
A starfish.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?
To get to the other size!
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
To get to the other side.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?
A hoarse fly!
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,
it was a shitzu."
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?
He was booked for a salt and battery.
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?
It needed to be trimmed.
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