How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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