How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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