How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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