How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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