How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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