How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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