How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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