How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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