How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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