How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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