How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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